I rarely have time to myself. Gary picked up a shift today so that we could have the weekend off, so that meant house to myself. As much as I loved having time to do something for myself, with no one to talk to, my mind raced. And it didn't help that Isabella was deciding to do backflips and make me think about her all day.
I'm starting to realize just how much our life is going to change. As much as we're prepared, I know that we can only prepare so much. And our little one is coming just before the holidays, so everything is going to be crazy as it is. Now we have to refigure out our holiday plans. There's no way I'm taking a newborn on our crazy holiday adventures. When Thanksgiving comes, the most she will be is 2 weeks. I don't even know if I'll be completely recovered by then, and if I'll be up for travel at all. And then we have Christmas. It's always exhausting as is. Christmas Eve we travel to CT, come home, sleep for a couple hours, and then get up and travel to my parents. We do 10 hours of driving (without traffic) in 2 days plus try to spend and enjoy time with our families. I don't know how we're going to pull it off this year, or any other year from now on. Neither of us want to let anyone down, but it just might have to happen. We also don't want to disappoint ourselves by not being able to be with our families. That's what the holidays are all about, but because we live so far from either family, and they live so much further from each other, it's always hard and exhausting to manage. Add a newborn into the mix and there's a lot more exhaustion.
Then there's the issue of going back to work. I'm taking 3 months off, how will I adjust to going back after that? And not only that, I'll be spending all my time with my little girl, how will I adjust to being away from her? And not only that, how are we going to afford for me to work part time, and pay for daycare? We're just getting by now, and we're both working full time and not paying for a child. And now we have to consider not seeing each other so that we can split up watching Isabella and only pay for parttime daycare. And then we have to find a daycare. We need one close by and even that is a struggle.
A few things that are coming first - I feel like I'm disappointing myself, and others. We have cancelled all travel plans, except for weddings and showers before Isabella gets here. This means no time with family, which I would really love. But I know that working full time is really taking a lot out of me and I can not physically do it. I'm already pushing myself too far and had to take this weekend to recoup. We're such "go, go, go" people that we always go somewhere on the weekends and I just felt so drained. My body was rebelling against me and I had to cancel the trip to my sister in laws baby shower. My feet and hands were so swollen. I was having trouble walking. It's so frustrating because I just want to do things and have fun, and I can't.
But on a good note, not going anywhere gives Gary and I more time to spend together and just be happy and excited for our little girl to get here. There's still a lot to do to get ready. Lots of laundry to get to. Cleaning out the nursery, still a little bit in there. Reorganizing pretty much the entire apartment to make room for baby things. I am beyond happy that I did the nursery early. I don't know how I'd fit it all in now. But it's completely done, all the furniture is in there and in it's place (minus the rocking chair my parents are getting me). The decorations are up. The dresser is starting to fill up. Now it's just waiting for the baby showers to load up the toys and other gear. I already cleaned out the linen closet so there's an entire shelf empty and ready to be loaded with all of her sheets and towels and such.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Saturday, August 20, 2011
3rd Trimester!
Today I am 28 weeks, officially starting my 3rd trimester. 12 more weeks and little Isabella will be joining us! To celebrate, I registered us for some classes. And the best part, my insurance covers the childbirth class! That's a $100 savings! September and October are going to be busy months. Sept 17 is my cousin's wedding, Sept 25 is my baby shower my mom is throwing, Oct 1 we're doing the childbirth class, Oct 2 is my baby shower my MIL is throwing, Oct 5 we're taking a class (baby basics), Oct 17 & 19 we're taking an infant CPR class, and then end of the month I go on maternity leave, go to NH for a wedding, and have a bridal shower. All other travel plans have been cancelled until after Isabella is here, and not sure how long after we'll start travelling again.
I sat down today and went through all of my bills that have built up this year. Wow, there's a lot. I now have (finally!) the information for Maine Care so I can get the information to the various places that have sent me bills so they can bill them, and then rebill me if needed. I am hoping that Maine Care will cover everything, but I don't know if they will. A couple of the bills, including the ER visit, was all pre-Maine Care coverage. The ER visit was only 2 days before so I'm hoping I can get them to cover it, otherwise it's $500 out of pocket. And I haven't received the bills from the glucuse tests that I just had done. Having a baby is extreamely expensive, even with insurance.
I sat down today and went through all of my bills that have built up this year. Wow, there's a lot. I now have (finally!) the information for Maine Care so I can get the information to the various places that have sent me bills so they can bill them, and then rebill me if needed. I am hoping that Maine Care will cover everything, but I don't know if they will. A couple of the bills, including the ER visit, was all pre-Maine Care coverage. The ER visit was only 2 days before so I'm hoping I can get them to cover it, otherwise it's $500 out of pocket. And I haven't received the bills from the glucuse tests that I just had done. Having a baby is extreamely expensive, even with insurance.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Almost time to say goodbye to #2
My 3rd trimester starts on Saturday. Heck yes, I'm excited!
So the past week has been a pretty great week for us. We had my Smith family reunion. Fantastic! Spent the day at the lake with most of my family. The 4 girls were together! I miss spending time with Hannah, Bri, and Trish and spending the weekend with them was great. It was great sharing the excitement of the coming months with my family. And my Gram made my day, well made my month. She looks at me, when I'm 27 weeks pregnant, and asks if I've lost weight. Obviously not in the belly area, cuz that's growing out of control lately, but everywhere else. My mom pointed it out too. :)
I had my monthly checkup yesterday. Everything is looking good. Right on track where it should be. Still 1 pound under pre-pregnancy weight. :) Went over the results of my labs I've had the last couple weeks and everything was explained a little bit more. Doctor is not worried about anything with me and Isabella. What a relief to hear! We talked a little about when I do go into labor. Once I go into labor, we call. 1 or 7 doctor's will be oncall. Whoever it is will be the initial doctor in to see me. But they call either one of my doctors to tell them that I am in labor and whichever one is oncall that day will be in. She said that the only way neither of them would be able to be there is if they both happened to be on vacation, or there was a death in the family, etc. They only miss maybe 1 or 2 births a year from their patients. Makes me feel so much better that they are that dedicated to being their for their patients. When we were there, we did the heartbeat check. Let's just say someone is already stubborn. Dr. P got the heartbeat in about 2 seconds, and then Isabella must have realized what was going on and decided to move to the other side of my tummy. She kept "running" away from the doppler. And then she kicked it! All I could do was laugh. Such a little brat already!
Dr. P gave me the best news of all: no more labs! Well, unless something goes wrong but otherwise, no more! My next appointment is in 3 weeks, and then we go to every 2 weeks. I can't believe we're that close already! Starting Oct. 19 we will be going every week. We're starting to look into all the classes that we can take and figure out our schedules so that we can take them. That's the hard part. And they're expensive. To take 3 classes (general birthing, beyond basics, and CPR) it's going to cost us $240 and we're going to have to miss work to do it. But it'll be worth it and we'll feel a little more prepared.
So the past week has been a pretty great week for us. We had my Smith family reunion. Fantastic! Spent the day at the lake with most of my family. The 4 girls were together! I miss spending time with Hannah, Bri, and Trish and spending the weekend with them was great. It was great sharing the excitement of the coming months with my family. And my Gram made my day, well made my month. She looks at me, when I'm 27 weeks pregnant, and asks if I've lost weight. Obviously not in the belly area, cuz that's growing out of control lately, but everywhere else. My mom pointed it out too. :)
I had my monthly checkup yesterday. Everything is looking good. Right on track where it should be. Still 1 pound under pre-pregnancy weight. :) Went over the results of my labs I've had the last couple weeks and everything was explained a little bit more. Doctor is not worried about anything with me and Isabella. What a relief to hear! We talked a little about when I do go into labor. Once I go into labor, we call. 1 or 7 doctor's will be oncall. Whoever it is will be the initial doctor in to see me. But they call either one of my doctors to tell them that I am in labor and whichever one is oncall that day will be in. She said that the only way neither of them would be able to be there is if they both happened to be on vacation, or there was a death in the family, etc. They only miss maybe 1 or 2 births a year from their patients. Makes me feel so much better that they are that dedicated to being their for their patients. When we were there, we did the heartbeat check. Let's just say someone is already stubborn. Dr. P got the heartbeat in about 2 seconds, and then Isabella must have realized what was going on and decided to move to the other side of my tummy. She kept "running" away from the doppler. And then she kicked it! All I could do was laugh. Such a little brat already!
Dr. P gave me the best news of all: no more labs! Well, unless something goes wrong but otherwise, no more! My next appointment is in 3 weeks, and then we go to every 2 weeks. I can't believe we're that close already! Starting Oct. 19 we will be going every week. We're starting to look into all the classes that we can take and figure out our schedules so that we can take them. That's the hard part. And they're expensive. To take 3 classes (general birthing, beyond basics, and CPR) it's going to cost us $240 and we're going to have to miss work to do it. But it'll be worth it and we'll feel a little more prepared.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Good News
I woke up to a phone call from Katie (one of my nurses) today. What a great way to start the day! She told me that my results were in and NORMAL from my test on Friday. No gestational diabetes here! My next appointment is next Monday, normal checkup. Get to her our little one's heartbeat. Can't wait.
There is one thing that I don't understand. Why is it that the father's aren't invited to the baby shower? I just don't get it. They are in this as much as the mom, sometimes more so. They created the child, are there for the moms when they need it, and are going to be there to raise the child. But they aren't allowed to celebrate the upcoming arrival with their families because they have a penis?! I guess I'm just not one for tradition and won't ever be.
There is one thing that I don't understand. Why is it that the father's aren't invited to the baby shower? I just don't get it. They are in this as much as the mom, sometimes more so. They created the child, are there for the moms when they need it, and are going to be there to raise the child. But they aren't allowed to celebrate the upcoming arrival with their families because they have a penis?! I guess I'm just not one for tradition and won't ever be.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Bad, bad day
So I had to take the 3 hour gluclose tolerance test today. 3 hours, doesn't sound so bad. Ha! What 3 hours really means is 15.5 hours. I got to fast for 12 hours, get at the doctor's office at 8am, have my blood drawn. And then I got to drink more of my favorite liquid, and because of my orange allergy I had to drink 2 bottles of the nasty stuff. So I do this, 20 ounces in 3 minutes (they give you 10 but I just wanted it over with) and then wait for an hour to have more blood drawn. I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything, including water. I was only allowed to take a few sips of water. I also wasn't allowed to leave. I could go outside on the bench if I needed some air, and that was it. So after 2nd round of blood was taken, I got to wait another hour and then do it again. And then I got to wait another hour and finally give a 4th blood sample. During all of this, I was slowly getting weaker and weaker. By the end I was struggling to walk and Gary had to help me out. I got home and ate a sandwich and then had to get ready for work. I got ready, and got to work just a couple minutes late. At this point I was still feeling incredibly weak and I tried to work but after about 20 minutes couldn't stand anymore. I went to the backroom to sit for a few minutes, hoping it would get better but it didn't. I then decided I had to leave. I called Gary and he's so amazing he came to take me home. I took a nap and ate a bagel and felt 1000 times better. I went back to work and finished out the night. I'm so glad it's behind me. Now I just have to wait a week for the results.
I think this would have been harder to do earlier in my pregnancy. The entire time Isabella was kicking and moving, reminding me why I was going through all of this trouble and it made it worth it.
I think this would have been harder to do earlier in my pregnancy. The entire time Isabella was kicking and moving, reminding me why I was going through all of this trouble and it made it worth it.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
The Good and The Bad
Well I guess I'll start with the good. Our crib came in! A big thank you to my inlaws for getting us a beautiful crib. It was the last piece of furniture that we needed for the nursery. So as you can guess, we worked on the nursery tonight. Very unexpected but so happy that we did. Everything is in. We have a toy chest/bench, dresser/changing table, crib, and bookcase. Oh, and the rug. We changed the setup from the original idea and love it. Now I just have to redo a little bit with the Tinkerbell/Star wall and that will all be set too. Which I realize I didn't even put in here. Well as soon as I have that figured out, I'll post more pictures. The bad about the crib: it came in with a chip in it, so we are waiting on a replacement part. The good news is that it'll be an easy fix when it does come in and we can just pop off the chipped piece and put the new one on in about 10 minutes.
So now for the bad. Last Friday I had my first gluclose test. Since I'm at high risk due to family history of diabetes, I got to take it a month early. Got up early, went into the lab, got my aweful drink and chugged. Because of my allergies I did not get the normal orange flavored drink so I got to "enjoy" the special lemon-lime flavor. Gross. The nurse comes out, gives me this bottle of clear liquid (10 oz) and tells me that I have 5 minutes to drink the entire thing and then I have to be back in exactly 1 hour to have my blood drawn. So I chugged the sugary gross stuff down and head out. I get through the test, all the while not haven eaten anything, and then go home and eat a lot. Then it was off to work I went. I got a phone call from the lab later in the day with the results. To make my day even worse, I find out that the results weren't good and my sugars were high. They wanted me to schedule a follow-up appointment for the following week. My heart just sank when they told me all this. Everything in my pregnancy has been exactly how I expected it, not good. And now it's just getting harder and harder and more is going wrong. It's very difficult to handle all of this, especially because my hormones are already on overdrive and I'm super emotional all the time. I called Gary crying and he did his best to reasure me, but honestly it just didn't help.
Now I'm waiting to go to have my next lab work done on Friday. I get to fast for 12 hours, go have my blood drawn, drink more of the nasty lemon-lime liquid, wait an hour, get my blood drawn, wait another hour, get my blood drawn, wait another hour, get my blood drawn. Then it will finally be over and after about 15.5 hours, I get to eat something. The worst thing about this is that I still have morning sickness. If I don't eat first thing in the morning, I get sick. After this lovely morning, I get to go to work for 8 hours. On a Friday night. :( Let's just say, I can't wait for this weekend to get here so I can be past this. The thing I worry the most about is that if I do have gestational diabetes, I might have to take injections. I just don't know if I can do it. And just checking my sugar levels at home. I grew up with my mom doing this multiple times a day, and still, after 26 years, cannot watch her actually do it. It's just a waiting game now, and wishing for the best.
So now for the bad. Last Friday I had my first gluclose test. Since I'm at high risk due to family history of diabetes, I got to take it a month early. Got up early, went into the lab, got my aweful drink and chugged. Because of my allergies I did not get the normal orange flavored drink so I got to "enjoy" the special lemon-lime flavor. Gross. The nurse comes out, gives me this bottle of clear liquid (10 oz) and tells me that I have 5 minutes to drink the entire thing and then I have to be back in exactly 1 hour to have my blood drawn. So I chugged the sugary gross stuff down and head out. I get through the test, all the while not haven eaten anything, and then go home and eat a lot. Then it was off to work I went. I got a phone call from the lab later in the day with the results. To make my day even worse, I find out that the results weren't good and my sugars were high. They wanted me to schedule a follow-up appointment for the following week. My heart just sank when they told me all this. Everything in my pregnancy has been exactly how I expected it, not good. And now it's just getting harder and harder and more is going wrong. It's very difficult to handle all of this, especially because my hormones are already on overdrive and I'm super emotional all the time. I called Gary crying and he did his best to reasure me, but honestly it just didn't help.
Now I'm waiting to go to have my next lab work done on Friday. I get to fast for 12 hours, go have my blood drawn, drink more of the nasty lemon-lime liquid, wait an hour, get my blood drawn, wait another hour, get my blood drawn, wait another hour, get my blood drawn. Then it will finally be over and after about 15.5 hours, I get to eat something. The worst thing about this is that I still have morning sickness. If I don't eat first thing in the morning, I get sick. After this lovely morning, I get to go to work for 8 hours. On a Friday night. :( Let's just say, I can't wait for this weekend to get here so I can be past this. The thing I worry the most about is that if I do have gestational diabetes, I might have to take injections. I just don't know if I can do it. And just checking my sugar levels at home. I grew up with my mom doing this multiple times a day, and still, after 26 years, cannot watch her actually do it. It's just a waiting game now, and wishing for the best.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Travel
Yesterday I got to spend the day with family, celebrating the upcoming arrival of my nephew. Overall a great day filled with love and joy of the new baby that will be joining us this September. The bad thing about my family is that they live so far away. Every event or visit is a full day of driving. It used to be that this wasn't a problem. Just annoying since I'm an impatient person and being in the car for close to 3 hours at a time was just boring. Well lately it's more than just boring. I am realizing how uncomfortable travel can be while pregnant. I am now 6 months and having to pee all the time. Just sitting in the car can be frustrasting. I don't want to stop all the time and make the trip longer, so I just wait until I can't wait any longer and then we have to make a bathroom stop. By doing this, I just get uncomfortable everywhere. Especially if we hit a bump. And then there's just the travel itself. Sitting for that amount of time is very uncomfortable. My legs get really sore and then when I do get the chance to get up, its tough to walk becuase I either have to pee so bad or my leg muscles are so tense. Here's the thing that gets me, out of the next 16 weekends left in my pregnancy, we already have plans to travel for more than 2 hours at a time on 8 of them. One of those weekends includes a trip (hopefully) to Canada. And then once Isabella is born, we'll be in the holiday season so we'll see how much travelling will be with her.
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